Location Dependency

You hang out with some folks, some great friends. Maybe several of them that you feel are as close as family. You do almost everything together, from little things like after work drinks to big ol’ events such as birthdays and holiday functions and even karate lessons. It’s like a whole family of people you actually like not just because you share a parent or two (full disclosure: I actually really like my family), but because you’ve met each other, gotten to know each other, and just enjoy each other as people. It’s this magical, wonderful thing, and you don’t think it could be any better.

But what about the possible existence of awesome people in some other part of the country or a foreign land that would be just as friendly — or maybe even friendlier — friends? You don’t even know who they are, but there might be some folks, maybe one in Montana, one in Guam, someone in Australia, even — whatever, you are all separated by great distances, but if you were able to meet either in certain combos or all together, you would form the greatest group of friends in history. It’s possible, right? Who knows?

Since you’ll never meet them, though, and don’t know they even exist, you asume you already have the best group of friends for your particular friend-needs ever right in whatever area in which you currently live.

Is life all about location and the logical advantages that go along with that? I’m not saying we should look at our friends and wonder if there are more compatible ones in Wales or Madagascar — that way madness lies. It’s something to ponder and blog about a little bit, though. Or maybe not. I dunno.

The same might go for your potential significant other. You meet one lady or fella or ladyfella, and you get them butterflies in your stomach or thereabouts, and it becomes true love. Soulmate stuff. But is that because you just will never meet someone in Japan that is actually way better for you in some cosmic sense we humans are ill-equipped to understand?

Again, we can’t constantly wonder that, because then we’ll just be uncommitted and alone and push people away while always looking for something else just in case. (Unless that’s how you want to roll for some aloof loner-type coolness factor.) This kind of leads to long distance relationships, a concept that, honestly, is inconvenient bordering on stupid. Out off all the people in the land you live, you can’t find one that you love and also loves you back? You meet someone from thousands of miles away, and that person is just better for you than the millions of folks that live in your city? Seriously? Is it worth the ridiculousness of being with someone you’re rarely actually with?

If not, then what? Meet someone whose location is more convenient for you, knowing s/he isn’t the one you want to be with, but dang it, plane tickets are expensive? So darn practical. Or should one just be alone and keep them fingers crossed that the right one will end up living in your zip code? Is lovey dovey time supposed to be that logical? Of course, never seeing the person you love sounds so frustrating.

These ruminations, appropriate for an emo teen of average intelligence but not for a 33-year-old-man, have been on my mind lately. Some of my best friends are on the other side of the country; my girlfriend is almost three thousand miles away.

I have terrific friends here where I currently live, too, but what about the folks in Ohio? In Atlanta? New York? And the folks I am not even aware exist because I haven’t met them yet? What would logic dictate? That I move to be near the ladyfriend or back to my lifelong friends? But what about my close friends that are kind enough to live in the proper location?

I don’t know. Were answers expected after all my bloggy woggy babbling?

All I know is that despite how much smaller the world feels due to advances in communication technology, sometimes it’s still frustratingly huge. Affordable jet packs would help.

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