djkirkbride.com » lemons http://www.djkirkbride.com Bloggy website of Eisner & Harvey Award-winning writer/editor (and ninja poet) D.J. Kirkbride! Fri, 20 Jan 2012 05:54:16 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 What does one do with the lemons life sometimes gives one? http://www.djkirkbride.com/2009/08/22/what-does-one-do-with-the-lemons-life-sometimes-gives-one/ http://www.djkirkbride.com/2009/08/22/what-does-one-do-with-the-lemons-life-sometimes-gives-one/#comments Sun, 23 Aug 2009 04:19:33 +0000 D.J. http://www.djkirkbride.com/?p=122 This is a pretty good question, in my humble opinion, and I cannot believe no one has ever asked it before. Indeed, what does one do when life says, “Here are some lemons, person”?

I suggest the following:

  1. Get a knife and a cutting board.
  2. Cut the lemon into four wedges.
  3. Get a glass.
  4. Put ice in the glass.
  5. Pour water into the glass with the ice already in it.
  6. Take one of the four lemon wedges into your hands by picking it up.
  7. Squeeze the lemon juice from said wedge into the glass of water and ice.
  8. Drop the wedge right into the glass containing ice and water and lemon juice.
  9. Fucking throw the other three lemon wedges away before they attract fruit flies or something.
  10. Enjoy a refreshing ice cold glass of lemon water.

You’re welcome.

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